Wednesday, December 16, 2009


Today we received some heartbreaking news.  It is not my story to share, nor do I know enough of the details to explain, but my heart is broken.

You always go through a whole range of emotions when you hear bad news.  Right now I am trying to understand why (which I know I will probably never know the answer).  I feel helpless because there is nothing I can do, and I feel guilty because I am not the one suffering.

You're always told not to take things for granted because it could all be taken away in an instant.  I know this is true, but who really lives this out daily?  Unless you're experiencing loss yourself, it seems like such a distant thing.  I feel completely selfish for not taking time to thank God for everything that he has given to me from the small things that seem to be meaningless, to the things that are so obvious I'm blinded to them.  When was the last time I thanked God for my amazing husband and precious son, or this little guy on the way?  Instead I pray about all things that frustrate me and beg for more patience.  Pretty pathetic when I think about it. 

I guess I'm being reminded of how distant I've become.  Not that I've strayed and gone off the deep end or something, but in my everyday life, I've forgotten Him.  At a time when I'm hurting and want to offer Him to other who are hurting too, He's not as close as I have led myself to believe.  Of course He didn't move... I did that on my own.

I'm still heartbroken, but I am thankful that I love a God I can reach out to, ask for forgiveness, and trust that He will open His arms and allow me to rest in His comfort.

Psalm 61:1-4

Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer.
From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint;
Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
For you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe.
I long to dwell in your tent forever
And take refuge in the shelter of your wings.

Friday, December 4, 2009

Quick Update and a Sneak Peak

I probably don't have any reason for disappering on here, being I'm on bedrest and everything, but I guess I just haven't had much to say or had any fun new projects to post about.

I had an OB appointment on Tuesday, and an ultrasound.  I am no longer on strict bed rest, but am not really supposed to do anything either.  I guess I think of it as being allowed to sit some instead of strictly laying flat.  The baby is still measuring big... over 6 lbs to be exact!!!  I am 33 weeks right now, so if I go to 40 weeks I am looking at having a 10 lb baby.  Anthony was 7 lbs 10oz, bigger than expected, and the dr says I won't be able to deliver a baby much bigger.  SO, they're going to do another ultrasound in 3 weeks and see how things are looking.  Then we'll discuss a plan from there.  I want to avoid a C-section if at all possible.  My body does NOT heal quickly and in past surgeries I've always reacted poorly to the meds they give you.  So being induced early may be an option, especially since Anthony was only a 6 hour labor.  They don't really want me going into labor at home since I am likely to have a very fast labor.  I am very ready to be done being pregnant and hope it will be safe for me to deliver soon.

Here's a sneak peak at the sweet little guy growing inside of me... reminds me this is all worth it :)

Wednesday, November 18, 2009


Last week, if you asked me what I needed the most right now, I would have said rest.  Rest from housework, chasing after a 2 yr old, cooking, people, etc.  Being pregnant, and a wife and mommy, is hard work!  I would've said I'd love nothing more than to curl up in my bed for a few days and just be left alone.  Apparently I must have prayed and asked Jesus to give me this.  And since I have such a loving and giving Father, he blessed me with what I asked for, just not quite how I was hoping.

Monday I was put on full bed rest.  It appears this little guy inside of me is just as anxious as his big brother was to come out and play.  (I was on bed rest from weeks 26-37 with Anthony)  Thankfully, I have not started to dilate yet and I am in week 30, not 26.  That means I am only looking at 7 weeks down, not 11 weeks like I did with Anthony.  This really isn't that comforting though... 7 weeks is still horrible in my opinion!  They have me on a muscle relaxant to help keep me from contracting; I am not a fan of how it makes me feel.

We were able to fly my Mom out on Monday to help care for Anthony.  She'll be here for 8 days, then Tony will be home for a few days, and then his mom will be coming out for a week.  After that, I'm not sure what the plan is. 

I am not prepared for baby's arrival yet.  I was stressed about this before being put on bedrest, so my mind is racing now.  I actually can't even write about it right now... I kind of forget to breathe when I start thinking about it.

Other than not having anything ready for baby yet, the timing is horrible.  I will be spending these days in bed: Thanksgiving, my birthday, Christmas, our anniversary, and New Year's.  Not to mention all the holiday parties and gatherings we'd been invited to, and my cousin's wedding.  Blah.  I just hope it starts snowing soon, so I can at least enjoy looking out the windows at that all day.

Well, that's my update and rant for today.  Back to doing... nothing!

Friday, November 13, 2009

Thanksgiving Turkeys

For the past 3 years now Anthony and I have made these to send out to family to wish them a Happy Thanksgiving.  They are made from tracings of his little hands and feet.  It has been so much fun to see how much he's grown.  Usually I just write "Happy Thanksgiving" and the year on the back, but I found this cute little saying that I'm going to use this year
"This isn’t just a turkey,as anyone can see.
       I made it with my hands and feet, which are a part of me.
       It comes with lots of love, especially to say:
       I hope you have a very Happy Thanksgiving Day!"
 I think I'm going to start hanging these on ribbon that I can add to every year.  Well, back to the cutting... that's the time consuming part!

Using the envelope system

This month we began using the envelope system.  I know quite a few people who swear by this method, but I have not been sold on the idea.  I like to know where every single penny is going, and I actually really enjoy importing all of our spending into an excell worksheet.  I don't remember where I heard it, but several months ago I heard someone say something along the lines of "would you rather know where every penny is going, or stay out of debt?"  It stuck with me.

We currently host an exchange student from China.  We have participated in the program for a couple years now, and absolutely love it.  It has been so interesting learning about other cultures, and I love having a friend around the house when Tony's on the road.  An additional perk in doing this though is that we get paid, $550 per month, to open up our home.  Since I'm a SAHM, this money has helped us make it through each month and we definitely rely on it to live!  Last month we found out that this will be our students last quarter with us.  She had planned on staying with us until June so it was a complete shock.  And I must say created some panic among us.  Especially with a new baby on the way.  I spent about a week going through our budget, and realized it was time for us to start using the envelope system.  It was pretty much our only option to make sure we stay afloat, along with lots of prayer that nothing major happens!

So here's how it's broken down:

Mortgage, Car Payment, Cell Phone, Electric, W/S/G, Internet, School Loan, Life/Car Insurance, Credit Card, and Tithe are all being payed online.  These things total aproximately $2300.

$125 is going into savings strictly to pay for the baby being born (this one's been going on all year).

And here's where the envelopes come into play:

Household items20
Home Improvement40
Eating Out/Fun30

I actually found it rather fun over the past 2 weeks seeing how much money I could have left before the next payday, and I was pleasantly surprised.  We'll see how much is left at the end of the month though :)  I'll make sure and post how it goes.

Does anyone else use this system?  Do you have any tips or pointers about it, or general ideas on cutting costs?

Monday, November 9, 2009

Cloth Diapers

I have been super busy the past week working on baby's cloth diapers (among many other things of course!).  One of the things I spent some time doing was changing my pattern around so 1) it was no longer an exact replica of someone else's design and 2) to see if there was a way to speed up the process of making each diaper.  I was sucessful in both of these!

One of the things that I did was make all of the elastic removable by snaps.  I haven't used cloth diapers before, so I have no idea how long the elastic is good for before it starts to loose it's stretchiness.  Since we want to have 3 or 4 kids, I'm pretty sure that by the time baby #4 rolls around, it will have worn out.  I HATE ripping out seams, and you want to avoid holes in the PUL to keep it waterproof anyways, so I thought this would make life a lot easier for me down the road.  It also saves me time in having to sew in the elastic.  Snaps take only seconds to apply :)

I also made the elastic in the waistband adjustable.  Anthony is really small for his age, so he needs it pretty tight, but with baby #2 measuring into the 93rd% right now, there's a good chance he'll be a little bit  rounder than Anthony by the time he's 2.  This also makes it so I can add in more snaps if needed to get the fit perfect.

To help in speeding up the sewing process, I am using one piece of fabric for the inner layer and cutting a pocket, instead of sewing two pieces together to make one.  The suedecloth doesn't pill or unravel, so it is working out well to do this.  I am just sewing around the opening to reinforce it.

I am still working on perfecting the soaker inserts.  Since Anthony is potty trained, he's only wearing these when he's sleeping.  He pees a TON during the night though!  It has been an interesting process figuring out exactly how many layers of fabric he needs to wake up dry in the morning.  Last night was successful... he had either 7 or 8 layers of the microfiber.  I know there are lots of other materials out there I can try for the soakers; wool, bamboo, hemp, etc., but I really don't want to waste my money on more fabric that may or may not work.  However, I did just get some bamboo fleece that I am going to try using with the microfiber.  Anyone made there own inserts before?  I've also read that it takes 5 washings for the diaper to reach it's maximum absorbency.  We've had no problems during naps though, which is great!

SO there you go... that's how the cloth diapering is going :)

Thursday, November 5, 2009

A lesson learned...

Yesterday was a LONG day... Anthony went to bed at 9:30 the night before and got up at 6am.  He ate a handful of cereal for breakfast, refused to eat lunch, and then we battled it out for a nap for over 3 hours before he finally gave in.  When he woke up, he cried for 20 mins because he wanted one of Mommy's vitamins.  Anthony is not a crier.  He never has been, so I had no idea how to respond.  Of course I didn't know why he was crying until he finally calmed down.  But then what was I suppose to do... he obviously still couldn't have one of my vitamins.  (What a wierd thing to be upset about!!!)  He ate only some pork for dinner, and then I put on a movie for him until Tony got home from Seattle.  Then we battled it out, again, until he finally went to sleep sometime after 9:30.

Then I couldn't sleep.  As I lay in bed, frustrated at my sweet little boy, I spent some time reflecting back over my day.  What went wrong?  I wanted to blame everything on Anthony, but as I prayed for some insight, I realized I had been pretty selfish with my time.  I spent my day on the computer, sewing, cleaning, and cooking.  And a good portion telling Anthony I would do "a" with him as soon as I finished "b".  I know specifically he asked to play cars, letters, baseball,  and guitars.  And did I do any of them?  Nope.  I went to bed feeling pretty horrible. 

So today, I'm going to try and change my attitude.  Instead of feeling like my day is being sabotaged by a little boy just wanting to play with his mommy, I'm going to see it just as that.  My guess is that I'll be surprised how much time will be left for me to accomplish what I need and want to do.

Does this challenge anyone else?  Anyone have any insight?

Monday, November 2, 2009

Newborn Sleeper

Yesterday morning I came across a new blog: This Mama Makes Stuff.  She has a tutorial for turning a T-shirt into a newborn nightgown, and I fell in love :)  I had set aside one of Tony's old t-shirts when working on his quilt... a cute baseball shirt from when he was little with Collazo across the back.  I decided the front of his shirt would be perfect for this project, so I got to work!  I wish I had a before picture... all of our cameras in the house happened to be dead at the same time.  (What are the chances of that!?!?)  Here's my after though:

I love it!  I think I will have to start watching for shirts at the thrift store so I can make some more.  These would be a fun addition to the baby blankets I usually make for shower gifts.

The back of the shirt I'm saving for another project for Anthony.  Thinking it will make a great Christmas gift for him.  You'll have to wait for that one though!

Friday, October 30, 2009

A Solution...

My husband hates getting rid of his clothes.  He still has stuff from Jr High that he hasn't worn since then.  A few months ago I convinced him that he needed to start going through his drawers.  How'd I do it?  I told him I would make those clothes into a quilt.  I'm pretty sure he's forgotten about it by now, but I've stashed all the old t-shirts away to pull out for his Christmas present.  A quilt.  A lot of the shirts do have some memory or story behind them, so I do understand why he holds onto them, but I think making them into a quilt is a much better solution to preserve his memories.  (And keep my sanity when trying to put his laundry away.)  I have 28 shirts in the pile below:

and after cutting and laying them out on another quilt as a template, here's what I ended up with:

 My squares are going to end up being 14.5".  Kind of a weird size, but it'll work.  I finished the squares for the top row today.  It took a LOT longer than I expected, but then again I've never made a quilt like this either.  I'm sure I'll get faster at it the more I do.  Here's my first 4 finished squares:

What do you think?  Do you like my idea?

Thursday, October 29, 2009

I want it!!!

While I was waiting to get my H1N1 vaccine today at by OB office, I came across this in a magazine.

You wouldn't know how perfect it was unless you knew what the curtains in the nursery looked like.

Wouldn't it be perfect!?!?

Tuesday, September 29, 2009


I'm probably about due for an update on life. I haven't really felt like saying much because, well, I don't really feel like I have anything super exciting or upbeat to say.

Life is in one of those lonely, stressful seasons right now. I'm missing the love and support of close friends and family. I'm overwhelmed with raising a two year old, nonetheless while I am pregnant. I'm scared and anxious about adding another baby to our family and really just want someone to tell me they completely understand and have been there too, and not just give me the "Don't worry you'll do just fine" speech. I'm impatient from waiting to find out if we'll be moving soon. Tired of struggling to get by. I wish I could ease the stress and pressure my husband feels right now. Wish we could hire someone to finish our house so he could rest.

I need a little sunshine in my life. Some encouraging words and someone to pray with me. And boy do I need someone to bend over and mop my floors! The fact that I already can't touch my toes is not very amusing to me when I still have 4 months until baby arrives... I am carrying SO low this time. I painted my own toes the day before I had Anthony :)

I feel a little better now getting all of that out. Sorry to be such a downer for everyone else. I'm sure my next post will be much more positive. My sewing machine is in the shop right now, and I'm looking forward to getting it back and finishing some projects (without wanting to throw it out the window).

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Homemade Cloth Diapers: Take 1

Here it is. My first homemade cloth diaper using all the correct materials. What do you think? It turned out just how it was suppose to, which is always good, but there are some things about it I'm not a huge fan of. So, now I'm going to start making some changes. My first change: the soaker. As you can see in the second picture, the soaker snaps into the diaper so it can be removed when washed and speed up drying time. All I can think about though is that in order to pull it out, you have to touch whatever is inside the diaper. Gross!!! I am going to try to adapt this tutorial for making a pocket diaper to work with the pattern I have. The pocket is on the outside of the diaper, which I think means less contact with the not so pleasant things. My second change will be trying out Velcro along the top instead of snaps. The snaps are easy to put on and very secure, but not at all fast if you're trying to diaper a wiggly baby. Also, when the diaper is in the largest size, there are two snaps left to dig into baby's skin. I can't imagine that to be comfortable!

Well, Anthony's napping, so I'm off to start diaper #2.

PS- I am able to get 10 diapers per yard, not the 6 to 8 I was thinking. Woohoo!!!

It's a BOY!!!

Despite what everyone thought, we will be welcoming another little boy into our home the middle of January. I actually wanted another boy, but I was so sure it was going to be a girl that I was shocked to hear the ultrasound tech say boy. I will try and upload the pics later. Everything looked good though. The Dr. did say something about the umbilical cord and placenta... I think that the cord was attached to the middle. She said it's nothing to worry about, but they're going to do another ultrasound next month. A little confused on that one.

Now we just have the fun part of choosing a name; we don't agree on a single one. Suggestions would be greatly appreciated :)

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Today's the day...

...we find out if we'll be welcoming a little girl or boy into our family! Appointment is at 3:30 and I'm getting rather anxious. Please pray for my bladder as I fill it full of water... trying not to think about that part!

On another note, I have officially begun "nesting." I had Tony pull down all of the baby clothes yesterday to sort and repack into storage bins. Yes it may seem crazy to have done it yesterday being my ultrasound is today, but I just HAD to do it. We are definitely set if we have another boy. I have 90 gallons worth of boy clothes from newborn to 12 month. A little overboard if you ask me, but 99% of it was given to us. The tricky thing though is that Anthony was born in June and this baby will be born in January. All of Anthony's newborn clothes are cute little shorts, t-shirts, and rompers. Probably not practical when it's below zero. Maybe we are not as set as I think!Now here are the things that I would consider "gender neutral." You'll notice the bin is much smaller and half of it is filled with blankets, burp rags, lap pads, etc. But really... how gender neutral is yellow and green. I think boy for both of these, unless there's pink somewhere on them. We'll see how many of these I actually use if it's a girl.The highlight of sorting all of these was watching Anthony try and put on his newborn clothes, shoes, socks, and hats. I can't believe I didn't take a picture of him all "dressed" up! And I can't believe he was ever so small!!!

We'll I'll be back later to post the outcome and some new ultrasound pics...

Monday, September 7, 2009

Bumbleride Stroller Giveaway

I can't believe this is being given away for free! Boy do I hope I win this, especially since Anthony's jogging stroller just decided it's out of commission. Check it out at the Best Baby Products Carnival over at Thrifty and Chic.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

I think I may be crazy...

Ever since we found out we were expecting again, Tony and I have been "joking" about using cloth diapers this time around to save some money. Although I know cloth diapers have come along way since I was in them, I still could only picture the white cloth folded up with diaper pins properly placed. You know, like these ones:

I started to do some looking into them, out of curiosity, and was amazed at how many cute and practical options are out there. And expensive! I know in the long run cloth ends up being cheaper than disposable, but seriously. Who has an extra $500 laying around for diapers with everything else you need to buy Especially when you still have to pay an arm and a leg to actually give birth to the baby. I kept doing some research though and found a lot of patterns out there for making your own. So this past weekend, I bought a pattern from Junktique at Etsy, and materials to try it out. (I actually had to improvise on some of the fabrics and notions... apparently you can't buy most of what was needed in a store) I was pretty impressed with how they turned out, and so was my hubby, so... I've decided on making my own. I ordered enough supplies today to start out with 6. They'll run me about $8-9 per diaper. Much cheaper than the $19 bumgenius diapers I'd been considering. Once I hit 30, I'll be done. Here's a picture of what they'll look like. I am going to make some slight modifications from the original pattern, but they'll still look about the same. I think I may be crazy...

Monday, August 31, 2009

Best Baby Products Carnival

One of my favorite blogs, Thrifty and Chic Mom, is hosting the Best Baby Products Carnival for the whole month of September. I am super excited to see what will be featured, especially with our new little one arriving in the next few months. Make sure and check it out!

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

I conquered a "giant" today

Today, I feel like I conquered a giant. I have officially finished a baby book for the first 6 months of Anthony's life!!! Although it's not quite 'homemade' or exactly what I dreamed it being, it's done. I frequently get offers from Shutterfly to create a free photo book, but have never finished one before the deal expires. I get too stressed out about making it perfect. This time I approached it from a different angle and was determined to just get it finished. I'm pretty proud of the end result and couldn't feel more productive if I tried. I didn't want to have another baby until it was done... I guess I'm offically ready now. Bring on baby number two!!!

PS- Sorry I can't make the picture any bigger :(

I Won!!!

Thanks to my lovely friend Christina... I won a giveaway! This super cute pillow will soon be making an appearance on my couch. Head on over to Pillow Designs by Joom to see all of the cute stuff in her store.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Look What I Found...

Yesterday I saw the cutest car seat cover. I asked the new mommy if she had made it, to which she responded "Yes... I sell them for $60." Well it sure was cute, but I can think of a lot of other ways I'd like to spend $60. But look what I just found (and bought)!!! I am so excited to start working on this, although I suppose I probably need to wait until I find out if this new little bundle of joy I'm carrying is a boy or girl. Bummer! I guess it gives me plenty of time to find the perfect fabric for either though. I can't wait for September to roll around...

Do you like it too? Check it out on Etsy here.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Focus Friday

This week I've decided to start to be productive again... at least attempt to anyways. My first trimester ends Sunday (Thank you Lord!!!), but I'm not planning on the morning sickness leaving anytime soon. I was sick my whole pregnancy with Anthony. However, I've come to realize that I don't really feel any better laying around then if I am actually up doing something. I can only nap with Anthony is taking one, or Tony is home, so if it's not one of those occasions, time to start doing something. Yesterday I started working on going through the house room by room and de-cluttering. I'm going to continue doing this throughout the week. Since a lot of it is going through drawers, I'm able to sit for most of it and Anthony is intrigued by what is in everything. I also want to get thank you cards for Anthony's birthday written and mailed. So here it is briefly:

1. continue de-cluttering the house
2. thank you cards

Play along with us... what are your goals for the week?

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Baby Bean's 1st Pictures

Here "it" is... our new little one complete with fingers, toes, and a little nose. I appear to be measuring a bit big, so my due date has been upped to January 17th. This makes me 5 days away from trimester #2. Woohoo!!! With that hopefully means some relief in the nausea department. We took Anthony to the ultrasound with us which he really enjoyed. He kept switching between pointing out the nose, feet, etc, and saying "Look, it's Nemo." I'm not sure how much he understands, but he did pray last night "Thank you Jesus Baby Bean's nose." SO cute!

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

My baby is not so little anymore...

Today I came to the realization that my little guy is well, not so little anymore. Yesterday, the above took place. I left him for 30 seconds, of course right after his bath, and came back to find this. I laughed so hard! There's no way that I could even be mad about it... and taking this picture just made me laugh even harder as I watched him cover himself. Today he did quite a few things that had me laughing too.

First thing this morning he saw a box of doughnuts sitting on the counter leftover from Saturdays garage sale. He asked for one, and I explained that they weren't good anymore (unless you enjoy eating rocks I suppose). A little bit later I moved the box down next to the garbage can, and put a box of recycling on top of it. I figured he wouldn't notice it if it was underneath stuff. Wrong! A few minutes went by, and in he came with a half eaten doughnut. "Anthony... No! That's garbage! It's icky!" "No," he said, "that's silly!

We had a few errands we needed to run today, all in the same parking lot, but several different stores. As we were walking from the vitamin store to Walmart, Anthony asked where we were going. I pointed to Walmart and told him "over there." He replied, "No, actually we go in there." (pointing to Quizno's) How many 23 month olds use the word "actually"? It was pretty funny to hear coming out of his little mouth.

This evening, I was working on folding laundry and packing for this week. Anthony came up to me with his toy pliers and asked if he could "Give Mommy haircut?" He proceeded by grabbing a chunk of hair, pretending to cut it, and saying "that's better." When he decided he was finished, he looked at me and said, "That hair-do handsome dude!" Where in the world did he come up with that??? I got him to say it on camera for me.... note his outfit though. We were trying on clothes to see what fit him still, and he refused to let me take this off of him. He said "I look like Daddy."


Monday, June 8, 2009

It's Official...

...this week has been the worst week of the year so far. We'll just skip Monday and Tuesday, although they really could add to the story, and start with Wednesday.

Wednesday, I had to have blood drawn for life insurance. The actual process wasn't as bad as it's been in the past, but I worked myself up about it all day. So much so that I was feeling too sick to attend school. This was the class I've been looking forward to... I was finally going to learn how to speak in the past tense in Spanish. Let me tell you how frustrating it is to only be able to speak in the present tense. This week is the last week of class... and I won't be able to go again :(

Thursday, Tony had to go out of town last minute. Not a huge deal, except remember the"morning" sickness? And guess what I had to do this morning? Go to my first OB appointment. By myself... with Anthony that is. Thankfully, I loaded my bag full of snacks and toys, and he made it through. Not sure how I feel about him having to watch the exam, but at least he is still young. My favorite part of this day was on my way out the door the handed me a slip for... you guessed it... blood work. Normally I prefer to cry while they do it, but this time I had my baby with me. I had to suck it up and be brave for him. I made it through. Maybe I should take him with me every time.

Friday I must have spent all day in bed sleeping (between trips to my new best friend... aka the toilet) because I really don't remember a thing. I know I got up for a couple hours in the evening, and was back in bed by 9pm. At 10pm I started puking. I'd been throwing up off and on since I found out I was pregnant, but I knew this was the beginning of the end for me. I puked all night. Literally. Every single sip of water I took came right back up. From 10 to 6am when I finally had my husband call the doctor to see if I needed to go in for an IV yet. Instead he called in a prescription for a lovely suppository for the same medication I had been taking orally. (Which obviously doesn't work if you're not keeping anything down.) The good thing about them is they knock you out. Within 30 mins, I was finally asleep.

So now it's Saturday morning. What I forgot to mention is that before I finally fell asleep, I was greeted by a mouse in the bathroom. A problem we thought we had taken care of 2 years ago. Or at least we hadn't seen one or any signs of one in two years. Great! Just what we needed! So while I sleep the day away, drugged up on medication, my poor husband, who also hasn't gotten any sleep, has to take our son to the hardware store and buy the needed supplies to deal with the mouse problem. Somehow he manged to re-mortar our foundation, and work on installing more insulation in the basement to keep them from getting into the house, all while caring for our son. He must have taken a really long nap! Saturday evening I finally got up to try and eat something and watched a movie with my husband. And that night, we both slept. (I spent the whole day praying for Jesus to come back... not even joking. He answered my prayer with sleep. Close enough for me!)

Sunday morning, I actually left the house and went to church. Mind you I still felt horrible. But I actually even ate breakfast before we went. I think this was the first time in a week I ate a real meal. I'm really glad I made it to church. We talked about the difference between living as an orphan and living as a child of God, and how our identity should stem from the later. It was such a good reminder for me right now. I would usually identify myself as wife, mommy, cook, housekeeper, etc. I must say I feel like a failure since I've become pregnant because I can't do any of these things well right now. Thankfully though, I am a beloved child of God... and that is who I am. Nothing I do or don't do can change that. Something I can't fail at... that's encouraging! I felt much better for most of yesterday. I made myself lunch, did a load of laundry, and vacuumed Anthony's room. I did something!!! By dinner I was nausea again and couldn't eat. So I took some meds and off to bed I went.

Monday, 12:30 am. Tony starts puking. My husband is the WORST puker ever. I seriously think the sound he makes when he is throwing up is the same sound he would make should he ever be stabbed. Since we only have one bathroom, he was kind enough to take care of it outside. However, it still sounded like he was laying next to me. Not a good thing when I'm trying not to be sick myself. So let's just say today hasn't been the best of days. Neither of us slept last night. We've been alternating sleeping this morning and laying on the couch trying our best to supervise Anthony. He's down for a nap, and I let Tony take the bed. I thought writing would be the best way to take out some of my frustration. Unfortunately the ones we love usually get the worst of it, and the last thing I want to do, or my husband needs right now, is for this to happen.

So let's just say it's been a bad week. Although reading back over this I can see some positive things. I'm really hoping that my Friday night was a result of stomach flu, and not the beginning of hyperemesis. Please Lord I don't want to do that again. (not sure what that is... check it out here.) These are definitely the times though I wish I was back in Olympia, close to friends and family. We've had lots of offers for help, but it's not very often that help arrives when you ask for it. Makes it hard to want to continue to ask. It's amazing how alone you can feel in times like these. This is the scariest thing for me in worrying about dealing with hyperemesis again. As soon as I got sick with Anthony, no one called, no one came to visit. Not that I would always feel up to either of these things, but I got nothing. When I was hospitalized for a week, the only person who came to see me was my aunt who was dying of cancer. That visit meant the world to me. But seriously, if she could do it... where was everyone else? These are the times when you find out who your real friends are, but sometimes, you just don't want to know. I actually I have friends I've been trying to call to even tell I'm pregnant. Friends I think who deserve a phone call before I post anything on Facebook and they read it there first. But it's been 3 weeks, and I haven't had the phone calls returned. Crappy.

I really think I've ranted enough for today. Although this hasn't been a very upbeat, happy post. I am thankful and hopeful. Circumstances could be much worse right now. I am thankful I am not in the hospital currently. I am thankful Anthony is content to play quietly by himself. I am thankful for my loving and supporting husband. I am thankful that God knows what he's doing and will never give me more than I can handle. And this gives me hope! We made it through this once... we can do it again. Please keep us in your prayers though... we could really use some encouragement right about now.

Friday, May 29, 2009

Focus Friday

Focus Friday

It's been a few weeks since I've posted, but I promise, I have good reason!

Last time I joined in on Focus Friday, my goals were to take a 2 week break from the TV and computer, to spend time studying Ruth, Esther, and Proverbs, and to work on becoming a better wife. I did great cutting out the TV, but the computer definitely proved to be way harder. I couldn't fast it 100%... bills had to be paid, and some emails just had to be sent. But let me tell you how easy it is to get side tracked! I read through Ruth and some of Proverbs, but as far as actually studying them, not so much. I think I am still moving in the right direction when it comes to being a better wife. Of course I still have horrible days where I am far from where God wants me to be, but it is more and more becoming a conscious thought of how I should be acting. If I can change my thoughts, I know my actions are going to continue to follow. It's a process. It takes time to change habits, and I'll get there soon. I am finding it harder though now that I'm pregnant. (For those of you who missed out on my last post, that's right, I'm pregnant.) I forgot how unstable the hormones make you emotionally! Not that I can use them as an excuse, but wow, do things just come out of no where sometime.

My main goal for this week is really out of my control, but I'm praying for some sort of miracle! I had hyperemesis with my last pregnancy, and was hospitalized for a week during week 7 of my pregnancy. I am quickly approaching this day, and with how I've been feeling the past couple days, am not feeling very optimistic. Please Lord keep me healthy!!!

Some more realistic goals:

1- enjoy as much time as possible with Tony and Anthony... things get tough for everyone when Momma's sick!
2- not stress about the housework, but do what I can to keep on top of the necessities (laundry, dishes, vacuuming)

And with that, I'm headed back to bed.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Focus Friday

Focus Friday

Well I did pretty good this week! I kept my house clean for the most part (noticing that Wednesdays are much harder with school though), did better with the bedroom (although still no master plan yet), and had a great week with my husband (thanks to a LOT of pod casts I've been listening to on being a wive/mother/women here. They are definitely challenging, but so encouraging to change.)

This week I want to:

-get the backyard cleaned up
-organize the garage (going to need Tony's help... hope he's up to the challenge)
-fast the television and the computer and read/study Ruth, Esther, and Proverbs. (For the next two weeks. Want to know why? Listen to this podcast on women and femininity.)

Be back in a couple weeks!

Friday, April 24, 2009

Did you know...?

My friend, Christina, posted about some things yesterday she's learned this week in raising her adorable little guy, see the cute button above. It made me laugh thinking of all the crazy things we learn as we go about raising kids.

Here's what I learned yesterday:

Did you know...

...waking your son up from a 5 hour nap, to find out he has a fever of 106.1 is very scary... especially when he's shaking

...having a nurse tell you to just give your son some Motrin and push fluids is NOT comforting after saying at 107 I need to worry about seizures... we took him to Urgent Care

... a sick 21 month old, will still tell you he needs to go potty to avoid "wet pants" even with a diaper on

... your husband will drop whatever he's doing at work and immediately come home upon hearing about his sick son... even when he's at an important trade show with all of his bosses

... when you're coming home late for dinner, because you've been at Urgent Care for the past 2 hours, do not stop at Albertson's for a rotisserie chicken... they put them out at 1pm. Nothing sounds appetizing about a chicken that's been sitting out for 6 hours... even when you're really hungry

...when your son is sick you get to cuddle him all day without being pushed away... enjoy it while you can because...

...the next morning, even with a fever of 103, he will be acting normal again... even if mom's still worried

Focus Friday

Focus Friday

I am so happy to have finally made it on here, on a Friday, to post my goals. I do really well accomplishing what I want to with this format, so you should give it a try too.

Hmmm... what are my goals for the week:

1. Continue keeping up on the housework. Besides our bedroom, the house has looked awesome all week. I'm so proud of myself, but it does lead me to the next one...

2. Figure out what it's going to take to keep our bedroom clean. It's the one room in the house that always gets overlooked. There's nothing too romantic or relaxing about looking at a heap of clean, folded clothes just waiting to be put away. I mean seriously, how long does it take to put the clothes actually into the drawers? SO frustrating!

3. Consciously think about if what I say and do, or don't say and do, is showing respect to my husband. And if not, repent.

My first goal should be pretty easy for me, the 2nd shouldn't be, but is, and the 3rd is really going to stretch me... in a good way. I'm so thankful that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me! (Phil 4:13)

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

I'm back... hopefully!

Okay so it has definitely been way too long since I've posted anything. Everyday I think to myself, "I have got to get on here and post something!" Yet weeks later, still nothing. But finally, here I am! I don't even know where to start... there are so many things going on right now.

We took a quick trip to Kalispell, MT for Tony's work. I'd never been to Montana, and as you can see, it was absolutely gorgeous! The following week we went to Kennewick for 4 days. Last week and this week Tony is in Montana again. It's been a crazy month, and I miss having my husband home.

I sewed with a pattern for the first time. Wow... so much easier than trying to make it up as you go. It was amazing to have all of my seams line up perfectly. I LOVE how this turned out and had so much fun making it, I bought fabric for another. I didn't take pictures yet, but I also followed a couple tutorials online for a wipes case and wristlet to go inside. I had a lot of extra fabric, so I thought it'd be fun to try out some new things

We're remodeling (took out a window and door, added a sliding glass door, will soon be adding a bedroom and more formal dinning room, and eventually a 2nd bathroom) and started re-siding the house. (Sorry these pictures got reversed)

I know I still need to post about our trip to the Dominican Republic, but that deserves a post of it's own. Hopefully I will get to that this week.

Other than that, I've been busy chasing Anthony around. We're still potty training him... only have him in a diaper when he's sleeping. I'm glad I keep with it and didn't give up a couple weeks ago when I was tired of cleaning up pee and poop from the floor. He's almost got it down now, and I love the money we're saving on diapers. He's talking like crazy! Saying complete sentences now, and using more Spanish too. He only asks for milk in Spanish: "Bebo Leche."

I'm also working on planning a benefit dinner for Legado, the school our friends our starting this fall in the Dominican Republic, a Beth Moore Bible Study on the Fruit of the Spirit, and have a meeting this week with a lady at World Relief to talk about how we (and our church) can start working with the incoming Refugees from Cuba (something we did before at our previous church with Refugees from Burma).

So there's a quick rundown. I feel so much better now having finally written something. Hopefully, I'll find time to keep on top of it. We'll see...

Friday, February 27, 2009

Focus Friday

Focus Friday

This weeks goals went pretty well. We're in Olympia now, so I obviously got the packing done, and we actually left with the house clean!!! I always want for this to happen, but it never does. I am looking forward to returning home to everything in order. I didn't get the quilts finished. Not because I didn't have time, but because I just did not feel like doing them. I'm so burned out from all the baby quilts I made this last year that I just have no desire to finish the few that I need to. Anthony is doing better with the potty training. Today we ate lunch at a restaurant and he asked to go all by himself. He's been accident free so far today, so I hope he keeps it up!

This week I will be in the Dominican Republic, so I don't really have any goals other than to not get sun burnt :o) Actually, I really hope to be able to invest into the lives of those we will be down there serving, and to learn a lot about what it's like to bring your family onto the mission field. I also hope to improve my Spanish, and become more comfortable speaking it with someone other than my husband.

That's it for this week... next week I'll be posting from the beautiful DR. That is if we have power that day...

Friday, February 20, 2009

Focus Friday

Focus Friday

I did pretty good this week taking some time out for me. Since Monday I've worked out 4 of 5 days, and done my devotions 4 of 5 days. Not bad!

This week here's what I need to accomplish:

1. Pack our bags for the Dominican Republic, and Anthony for Grandma's
2. Finish the quilts for my Nieces so I can bring them with us
3. Have the house clean before we leave town
4. Work with Anthony on going potty without being told to

I could think of a lot more, but these are the big ones. It's going to be a busy week!

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Valentine's Gift/Our Wedding Scrapbook

For Valentine's Day this year I decided to scrapbook our wedding to give as a gift to my husband. I haven't done much scrap booking, but I am pretty happy with how most of the pages turned out. I didn't get all of it finished, but I did get the ceremony and reception completed. I also "re-did" our guest book, as this was one of the things our dogs decided looked tasty and ripped apart. I didn't take the sheets out of the pages for the pictures, so they're not the best, but they'll at least give you an idea. Enjoy!